My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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