kristin has been a bad kristin
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
