I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
