Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize