at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
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