you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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