Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
