what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize
