But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Randomize
