I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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