Are we in a gay sports bar?
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize