I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
