U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
