I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
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