Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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