Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Never joke about your clitoris.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
