none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
only if we run a train.
done.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Hippo gnu deer
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Randomize
