You're completely useless in the revolution.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Randomize