Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
