I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
