That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
