He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
thus making me awesome and them whores
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Shame - the story of my life.
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