what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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