I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize
