Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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