Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize