Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
