i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
they call him Oral-B. enough said
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
