I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
