Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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