Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(636): View more from Missouri

dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you

(1-636): View more from Missouri

when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced

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(419): View more from Ohio

There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around

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(973): View more from New Jersey

How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson

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(312): View more from Illinois

i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it

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(251): View more from Alabama

I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.

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(330): View more from Ohio

French fry pizza

(502): View more from Kentucky

Are you brilliant or just really high?

(330): View more from Ohio

Can't it be both?

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(860): View more from Connecticut

i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.

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(707): View more from California

The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.

Fav 6 26 58
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