There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I miss vodka workout Fridays
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
