Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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