i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
