Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
