okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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