The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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