what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
why do cheetos always look like penises
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
