Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
