either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I need a burrito and a hug.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
