"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
