i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
