I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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