If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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