no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
