Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
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