maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
How's work?
Spinning.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize