Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
