During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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