were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
My apartment stinks of burning failure
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
