9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
