I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Randomize
