How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
only if we run a train.
done.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
